Sonnet V – The Wreck

60

January 23, 2019 by petrujviljoen

img_6002 (158x211)

Copyright Petru J Viljoen

there’s no-one left to remember. it’s on
to seventy-five years since the Chev rolled down
the mountain. The chrome on the bumper shone
in the midday sun, enough to distort the frown

of the one who bent closer, who looked in-
to the fog of time, morphing the present;
the past a hologram; souls who have seen
who have borne witness of a quest fervent

seeking peace, forgiveness, deliverance
from a hell-fire brewed – a moonshine potent
enough to raze the years of innocence;
all memory brought to the moment.

the present a contract compact, a fevered brow
cooled – a whoosh of wind, a mercy bestowed

….

Linked to Dverse Poets

Linked to Friday Fictioneers  – inspired by the photo by Ted Strutz

teds-car-in-the-woods

Coppyright Ted Strutz

 

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60 thoughts on “Sonnet V – The Wreck

  1. lisarey1990 says:

    Very well pieced together.

  2. granonine says:

    I read it twice, and I still don’t think I’ve enjoyed this to the extent that I could. Great job.

    • If it needs to be explained it probably didn’t work very well although many have expressed interest in trying to. It’s basically a case of entering a state of mind, at the point of looking into the gleaming chrome of the bumper, to find a virtual set of circumstances, a set of imaginings, of what happened that the car rolled down the slope of the mountain and the consequences for the driver and the survivors. The moonshine refers to alcohol – the most probably cause of losing control of the vehicle.

  3. Sandra says:

    Reading the comments I had to remind myself what enjambment was. I’m not big in the poetry stakes, but I know what I like. I liked this.

  4. Lona Gynt says:

    An exploration of a mystery, to see the humanity in artifacts, imagine the circumstances. Blevins Gap?

  5. sdtp33 says:

    Beautifully crafted sonnet, nice flow to it, one to come back to , a touch of the enigmatic.

  6. I love the car corroded by the fogs of time. It has a mystery and sense of loss, never being able to hold on to time. You certainly seem confident with your sonnets now. Great to do a sequence.

  7. Really enjoy the imagery that springs from the metaphor. Nice job!

  8. robtkistner says:

    “…a hell-fire brewed – a moonshine potent
    enough to raze the years of innocence;”
    That is a powerful vision gained from staring into that bumper. I liked this Petru. An expanded perspective gleened from that wreck in the woods

  9. lynn__ says:

    Mysterious wreck…I like the idea of past as a hologram and your play with word “compact” 🙂

  10. erbiage says:

    wow! well done. i once found an old car int he woods… fascinated about how it got there.. wondering about who had driven it, maybe someone was conceived in that back seat…

  11. Beautiful from the beginning till the end!

  12. Charley says:

    An engrossing poem. And yes, indeed, great use of enjambment. Also a tad of surrealism… icing on the cake for this reader.

  13. I liked this. Thanks for sharing.

  14. Grace says:

    I like the use of enjambment, with volta like a moonshine potent, and that ending couplet ends beautifully. There is mercy after all.

  15. Glenn Buttkus says:

    Perfection as a modern sonnet. I have encountered that Chev in my dreams, lying in the loin of a tangled arroyo, a once jet black 1948 coupe with twin James Dean spotlights, the windshield shattered, it’s back broken, covered now with time’s patina. I see the skeleton at the wheel, but lacked the courage to investigate.

  16. V.J. Knutson says:

    So many tales related to those old cars. I don’t pretend to understand your message, but I related to past history visiting the present, and the presence of alcohol and how time softens history. Enjoyable read.

  17. kim881 says:

    I love the story in this sonnet, the rhymes and enjambment, and especially the lines:
    ‘…The chrome on the bumper shone
    in the midday sun, enough to distort the frown

    of the one who bent closer, who looked in-
    to the fog of time, morphing the present’
    and
    ‘…a moonshine potent
    enough to raze the years of innocence’.

  18. Love these lines: “morphing the present;
    the past a hologram”

    You have a way with words, beautifully well expressed and fantastic writing.

  19. Sabio Lantz says:

    Sorry, mate. I could not follow this. But I was caught from the beginning with the concrete story about the car 75 years ago, but after that, too abstract for this poor mind. I was hopeful

  20. sanaarizvi says:

    Love this especially; “a moonshine potent enough to raze the years of innocence.”💞

  21. I do love how you let the sonnet tell a story that morphed into an extended metaphor with the conclusion… the image of that old car to start with is wonderful

  22. neilmacdon says:

    The past’s a hologram. How could I not like that?

  23. Frank Hubeny says:

    Nice line: “to the fog of time, morphing the present;”

  24. Nan Mykel says:

    Reblogged this on NANMYKEL.COM and commented:
    “enough to distort the frown

    of the one who bent closer, who looked in-
    to the fog of time, morphing the present;”

    If this is enjambment, it’s delicious!

  25. Susanne says:

    Some solid imagery here and I enjoyed the image of past and present colliding through the reflection of a wrecked chrome bumper.

  26. memadtwo says:

    The memory both compressed and held, the wind indeed a mercy. (K)

  27. impressive use of enjambment. It gave it such a natural flow.

  28. susanmehr says:

    The mention of moonshine made me smile, and yes it does ‘raze’ the years of innocence.

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