Last Dance

41

May 31, 2013 by petrujviljoen

Friday Fictioneers is a group of writers from all over the world participating in a 100-word flash fiction challenge. It is hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. This week’s photograph is courtesy Janet Webb who holds copyright. Visit Rochelle’s website for the how-to of all of this. Join us, it’s fun.

window-dressing-janet-webb

General fiction

100 words.

It was her only dress. He knew that. She found him going through her cupboard before he left that morning. During supper at the Pizza Hut he asked why she always wore black. She levelled her gaze at him for so long, he reddened and looked away. His invitation to the Hyde Park Hotel was, therefore, a challenge. She knew he would. They all did.

She took the dress from its plastic sleeve. Across aeons she heard the giggles, saw the pointing fingers and watched her partner walk away.

The bloodstain on the seat of the dress was still visible.

………………………

Click on the code below to read the other writers’ work.

 

<!– start InLinkz script –>
<a href=”http://www.inlinkz.com/wpview.php?id=276130″><img style=”border:0px” src=”http://www.inlinkz.com/wpImg.php?id=276130″></a&gt;
<!– end InLinkz script –>

Advertisements

41 thoughts on “Last Dance

  1. 40again says:

    Unusual take on the prompt this week and well done for tackling the subject.
    Dee

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Thanks Dee. ”That Time of The Month” is no longer such a deep dark secret that was whispered about by females only. Nothing to be ashamed of.

      Like

  2. Sunshine says:

    i guess i am a bit confused. why was the man going through her cupboard that morning? aside from that, you covered on the dreadful moment(s) well. ugh to those moments.

    Like

  3. Dear Petru,

    I have a story I could relate but won’t. Suffice it to say I understand and you captured the feeling of what it can do to a woman who’s had her innocence taken by force. .

    shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Hi Rochelle. Most women have a story like this. Some didn’t get off so easily. For aeons, what women go through once a month was too obscure to talk about. It’s liberating that one can. The men that commented weren’t fazed and that’s affirming. Look forward to another inspiring prompt next week.
      Shalom. Petru.

      Like

  4. I got this straight away – brilliantly well-written.

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Wow. Thanks for calling it brilliant. I’m not sure the story deserves it. Writing a fictional event about an acutely embarrassing situation that most women have found themselves in wasn’t that easy. Thanks for reading! Looking forward to next week.

      Like

  5. neenslewy says:

    An interesting take – took me a few reads to get it – then read the comments – so I was right- embarrassing and something that has happened to most at some point.

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      There’s obviously something the matter with the structure of the 100-words. Most people didn’t get it at first read. Something for me to work on. Look forward to the next prompt. I haven’t had this much (intellectual) fun for a while!

      Like

  6. What a trauma. And I assume she had to test them, and they all failed…

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      It’s not that she was testing them, it’s just the way it worked out. You’re one of the few that understood the cycle of events.

      Like

      • The comments helped… but it got me thinking… why repeating and repeating…

        most would do a lady Macbeth and cry “out damn spot”

        Like

        • petrujviljoen says:

          Laugh! Some people get caught in a psychological trap that they mostly set up for themselves and a distorted ego won’t let them leave it. Bizarre but true.

          Like

  7. As AnElephant and a mere man, can I just say that I thought your story was excellent.
    You did very well on an extremely tricky subject.
    Thank you.

    Like

  8. nightlake says:

    can empathize with this. Certainly different and well-told

    Like

  9. Sandra says:

    The ultimate nightmare. I think we were kinder when it happened to one of our group. An unusual take on the prompt. Well done.

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Thanks Sandra. Did the structure work well? Was it clear how she treated men in her life after that?

      Like

      • Sandra says:

        I understood what had happened, and how it had affected her, but the significance of the Hyde Park Hotel and ‘she knew he would. They all did’ eluded me. Maybe it’s too early for me.

        Like

        • petrujviljoen says:

          Indeed that’s the bit that had me wondering if it was clear. The idea was that over the years, she allowed men to date her for a while, got to know her a little until they started asking questions about her clothes. Then they all wanted to get her to wear the only dress that wasn’t in black.

          Like

  10. betarules says:

    That is so sad. Well written. (RogRites)

    Like

  11. JackieP says:

    Now that was certainly different, but in a very good way! I enjoyed it a lot.

    Like

  12. I thought of giving you a hard time and saying I didn’t know what to think of this but I was still thinking, but I decided to just tell you the truth–I like it. 🙂

    janet

    Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Thank you! Thanks for liking this one. I’m still a bit bemused about your reaction last week. You had me scrutinising the story to see what the matter was. You didn’t say why you were unsure about it.

      Like

  13. N Filbert says:

    what a punch! good work

    Like

  14. The Real Cie says:

    I understand perfectly!
    I will share a bit of WTMI. I “became a woman” (not lost my virginity but started my period) when I was twelve. I had no idea at that point in time that I might think my period was over but it actually wasn’t. I also had no idea that I was someone who would always have very heavy periods. I was wearing white pants. My mother and I were in a department store. An unexpected gush of blood soaked my underwear and trousers. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
    I never wore white pants again.

    Like

    • Totally off story topic here but in grade school I had a friend who said she couldn’t wait for that moment so she could be a woman (or some such drivel.) I thought if that was it, I’d pass. 😉

      janet

      Like

      • petrujviljoen says:

        Although I brought the topic up, I’m now a bit shy to discuss these issues on a forum like this. I have here quotes from various women about what it’s like to be a woman. Regarding menses, one woman said it was the only time she could be herself! Could relate.

        Like

    • petrujviljoen says:

      I’m going to have to ask what WTMI means. One had to learn what to wear during these times. Thankfully women are no longer regarded as dirty because of this. I hope.

      Like

  15. kdillmanjones says:

    This was perfectly weird. (Or maybe I’m just reading it that way.) The “Hyde Park Hotel” phrase really set the tone for me here. Great story!

    Like

  16. I wonder, is it poverty alone? Or defiance? Or a kind of trial for her dates that makes her wear this dress again and again? (I’m interpreting “They all did.”) Good story.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Copyright

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material or any part of this material without express and written permission from myself is strictly prohibited.

proartist.viljoen79@gmail.com

Join 483 other followers

Artist Statement or rationale or why do I do what I do

petrujviljoen

petrujviljoen

I make art, I read a lot and I'm now trying to write as well. Otherwise I belong to a cat by the name of Charlie that drives me nuts sometimes and other times makes me melt with love for her.

Personal Links

View Full Profile →

%d bloggers like this: