Friday Fictioneers

24

February 14, 2013 by petrujviljoen

Rochelle Wissoffields hosts the Friday Fictioneers. It’s a challenge to write a story of 100 words based on a photograph. It’s fun. Do take part. The photo is copyrighted to David Stewart.

friday fictioneers prompt pic dsc04876

She circled the sculpture, even peered at the face. The expression was one of intent. The hand reaching out was not to stop a fall. She scrutinised the objects on the ground. The work seemed otherworldly. Forgetting she was in public, she assumed the same pose to fathom the action.

Aha!

He was reaching for something! Something special to be added to his odd collection of objects. And he had to act swiftly, before it became commonplace. Smiling inwardly, she hurried off. Once back, she placed the marble from The Solid Mandala by Patrick White where he could reach it.

(Constructive criticism welcomed).

24 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers

  1. rich says:

    well done. i like the idea of someone mimicking the statue to understand it, but is there a way we should/would know what ” she placed the marble from The Solid Mandala by Patrick White” could possibly be?

    • petrujviljoen says:

      The Solid Mandala is a story about a ”simpleton” and his more practical brother. The ”simpleton” used a marble as a meditative object and he tried to convince his brother of the validity of the practice. A few people commented that was familiar with the book. Those that did not read it – it’s a Very Good Story.

  2. So the Guy had lost his marbles? 🙂 I like the story.

  3. Anne Orchard says:

    I loved the idea of your character understanding the statue by copying its posture – lends me a whole new perspective on appreciating sculpture. The only thing I wasn’t quite sure about was why he (the statue, I think) had to act swiftly ‘before it became commonplace’ – I did not manage to understand this. Overall a nice way to use the sculpture literally in your story.

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Since reading all the other comments and stories, I realised I misunderstood the photograph! It looked as if the figure was reaching for something and I never realised there was a smaller figure, coming up out of the ground holding onto his leg, I thought it was an abstract object. So I decided he was reaching for something to add his collection of objects and was wistful in making him ‘act swiftly’ before something ‘special’/abstract would become ordinary by not being fetched. Think I tried to be slightly poetic.

  4. I can see your character posing and then hurrying off to find the marble. you did a nice job of showing in this piece.

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Thank you, I appreciate it. If there’s anything to seriously criticize, please do so. I want to learn.

  5. JackieP says:

    interesting take on the picture. I liked it. 🙂

  6. I could just see her assuming the same pose. Now I also have something else to look up and read. Thanks for that.

    janet

  7. kdillmanjones says:

    I enjoy your writing style! I would have loved to see more of what’s going on in this character’s life, like this is only a window into some larger thing happening in her life. So thank you for pulling me in.

  8. Dear Petruj,
    I smiled at the mental image of your MC assuming the same pose as the statue and I enjoyed your take on the prompt.
    shalom,
    Rochelle

  9. Sandra says:

    It was interesting that the protagonist saw the person half submerged in the concrete as otherworldly ‘objects in the ground’ . And thank you for the reference to The Solid Mandala. I take it that the fleeing figure is Arthur?

    I think I might have left out the author’s name which seemed a tad expositional; those interested enough to google would have gleaned that information. Enjoyed this piece, and learned something new. This is why I enjoy Friday Fictioneers’ eclectic mix of writing.

    • petrujviljoen says:

      Yes, I didn’t realise it was a half submerged figure. The fleeing figure is a new person altogether. The only feature from the Solid Mandala is the marble.

  10. Interesting take, that you involved the objects on the ground also. I could only see the arm reaching out. Fascinating to read everyone’s perspective on this photo. I am curious about the use of the The Solid Mandala and Patrick White though? I haven’t read the story.

  11. N Filbert says:

    delightful to read it from a visual artist’s perspective.

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